Chapter Twenty-Eight
“Are you crazy?” Catherine gasped, staring up at her father in disbelief.
“Slightly, yes,” Jensen answered, chuckling now. “Whether you or Grey choose to see it, fate has laid out her plans for you. You were taken to a pack 3,000 miles away yet find your way here? My true mate and I have been unable to procreate and when I am getting to the point where I may need to step down, a long lost daughter appears? A daughter with the same rarity as myself?”
Catherine rolled her multi-colored eyes. “It’s a genetic mutation not…”
“Before today there has only ever been one person in our entire lineage with my gift. It is not a genetic mutation, Catherine. Your eyes aren’t just a coincidental lining of chromosomes. It’s a physical representation of your relationship with the wolf side of yourself.”
Catherine closed her eyes and shook her head. “What are you talking about?”
He sighed and stuffed his hands in his pockets. “When was your first shift?”
Catherine gaped at him and felt her face heat. A memory flashed in her mind of a young version of herself, so small anyone who saw her running by might think her to be a husky puppy. She hid in the tall grass, shaking with fear as larger wolves scoured the land for her. She didn’t know why she needed to hide, but she knew no one should know. As she got older and learned how most wolves shifted when they hit puberty between 12 and 14, she understood why she had to keep her true nature a secret.
“Catherine?”
“I… I don’t know.”
He nodded his head. “Because you were so young your memory doesn’t go back that far. Your instincts told you to hide your ability. So you did. You blocked your shift to the point where I’m guessing now you only shift when the pull is strongest during the full moon.”
Catherine gaped at him. Her knees weakened and she sat on the concrete bench a few feet away.
“Your eyes: one brown, one blue, represent the two halves of your soul. Most people get their wolf nature later in life. It completes them in a way they weren’t before. It awakens their animalistic instincts. You and I, however, always had those instincts. We grew with our other halves intact making us stronger, more intune with all of our sides. That’s why it is painful for you to shift. Even more so than it was for me. I am full lycan while you have both wolf and lycan in your dna. Your wolf and lycan sides have always been with you, it goes against your nature to choose between the three sides of yourself. I had people growing up who could help me. If you let me, I can help you too.”
Catherine smelt something carry up through the wind. She glanced to her right and saw Graham, back in his human form watching the father and daughter.
“Is everything he said true?” Graham asked with a tilt of his head to Jensen. Catherine nodded. “Let’s go.”
Graham turned on his heel and started back up the path. Jensen sighed and rubbed his jaw in thought. He extended a hand to help Catherine up from the
bench.
“The two of you have a lot to talk about. I’ll be here if you have any questions.”
“Any more, you mean?” she asked, laughing at the absurdity of it.
“No matter what he decides. I’ll be here for you.”
By the time Catherine made it back to the packhouse, Graham was already waiting for her in the Mustang. She climbed into the passenger seat to find him glaring out the front window. She followed his gaze to the side garden where Jensen was watching them. Graham’s knuckles tightened on the wheel before he shoved the car in drive and spun out of the gravel driveway. By the time he turned onto the road, he was going over fifty miles an hour. Catherine clutched the passenger door handle as he took corners going way too fast.
“Graham, please slow down,” she gasped.
His eyes flicked to her and then filled with guilt. He lifted his foot off the accelerator and she watched with gratitude as the speedometer fell.
“I’m sorry.”
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Chapter Twenty-Eight
“Tell me what’s wrong. Talk to me,” she urged, placing her hand on his thigh.
Instead of calming him, his eyes narrowed. “He commanded me.”
“Jensen? Why does that surprise you?”
“I can usually ignore his orders. I’m usually strong enough but he got the better of me and pinned me. I didn’t have the strength to fight the pressure so I had to submit,” he growled.
“He’s your alpha…” she said, not understanding.
“He basically raised me, Catherine. He’s never forced an order on me. For it to be this one? I wanted to fucking challenge him. He knows what would happen
if I did.”
“What did he order you to do?” she asked, nervously. His skin shivered as he fought to shift. “Graham?”
“He ordered me not to mark you until he’s given me permission!” he roared.
“What?! How dare he! He can’t do that!”
“He did, Catherine! He fucking did and there’s nothing I can do about it. He thinks he can get me to cave into being his beta and he’s using you to do it.”
“Why does he want you to be beta so badly?” she couldn’t help but ask.
“Because I’m the best for the job,” he scoffed with a rare sound of self-pride ringing in his words. She couldn’t help but smile at him, knowing he was probably right.
“Wouldn’t most people kill to be beta to a powerful lycan like him?”
He growled. “Idiots who don’t know any better.”
“Does that make me an idiot then because weirdly the idea of being luna of this pack feels right. When I found out I was next in line it felt like a puzzle piece clicking into place. Maybe we should talk about…”
“No! I don’t know what that man said to you while I was on my run but it’s not going to happen, Catherine. I will not be accepting the position and neither will you!” Graham gunned the accelerator again, blowing by their house.
“What is so wrong about being a beta?” she asked, starting to feel angry about his reaction.
He laughed darkly. “Let me guess, based on your observations betas are all proud and mighty. They like going to extravagant charity balls, fancy dinners and weekend vacays to the beach or mountains or where the fuck ever their personal travel agents sends them. They live on the top floor of the packhouse like it’s a fucking honor rather than the prison it is. I bet they even gloat about the fact that they’re basically fucking baby sitters to the alphas who expect their betas to clean up their messes and take a goddess damned bullet for them!”
“Jesus, Graham, I…”
“Well let me tell you what it’s really like. You don’t know how lucky I’ve been the last two weeks. I never get to spend more than a week at home. Why? Because even as lead warrior I’m charged with traveling all over the continent and sometimes abroad to settle petty squabbles between packs in our districts. I oversee information gathering, attend meetings, go to fucking war, Catherine. Now imagine if I become beta. I would never be home. Even when I am in town, I’ll be with Jensen. And you? You’ll be alone.
“My father was beta. My family never saw him. My mother raised me. I had to join the fucking Blackmoore Lycan regiment at fourteen just to see my father. And even then I only got a year to know him. Do you know what my father’s last words to me were?” Graham looked over at her. Tears were already forming in her eyes but when she saw the glassy red state of his those tears ran free. “My father’s last words were to tell my mom he was sorry for leaving her. For never being there for her. That if he could do it all again he’d choose her. Then he died in my fucking arms, Catherine. All because someone shot at his alpha and it was his duty to step in that bullet’s path.” He glared back at the road. He’d somehow circled back around and they were barreling down the street to their house.
“I will not let that happen to us. I will not let you raise our children alone. I will never accept what your father thinks is our destiny. Fuck destiny. She can keep the fake respect and extra money that comes with being beta. I want my family.”
Graham pulled into the driveway and was out of the car in less than a heartbeat. He slammed the door and stalked toward the house. Catherine took a
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Chapter Twenty-Eight
moment to collect herself. She wiped the tears from her cheeks and took a deep breath. This wasn’t just about her. Her mate needed her. Taking another deep breath, she got out of the car. She ignored the billowing curtains of their nosy neighbors and walked through the front door. She found Graham in the kitchen. He was sitting at a chair by the table. An open bottle of whiskey sat on the table beside him but he hadn’t drank from it. The fact that he’d even
pulled it out was worrisome. His hands were gripped tight together in his lap, his head was bowed and his right knee bounced.
Catherine walked up to him and put the lid back on the whiskey bottle. He looked up at her and she saw a few of the tears had escaped down his cheek. She cupped his cheek and a few more fell. She sighed and pushed his hands away so that she could sit in his lap. He immediately gripped her tight about the waist and pulled her further against him. She wrapped her arms tightly about his shoulders while he buried his head in her neck.
“I can’t do it, Baby,” he whispered, his voice filled with agony. “I’m not as strong as he was. I would rather let the bullet kill my alpha than leave you alone in this world.”
Catherine sighed and ran her hand up through his hair. She pulled his head back and gazed down at him: her unbelievably strong mate. She wondered if anyone had ever seen him so torn before. Her heart expanded with the knowledge that he probably would never let anyone but her see him fall apart.
“Maybe that’s why Jensen needs it to be you,” she said, suddenly certain of it. Graham fell silent. “Come on,” Catherine said, standing.
Chantar
Surrendering to Destiny
