Chapter 188 – In My Shoes
-WARNER’S POV-
I didn’t want to be here.
Not standing in this hall. Not breathing the same air as Blake Walker.
And definitely not listening to him speak.
But I was, because Zane had ordered it.
I stood next to Sheila, arms folded across my chest, trying not to let my face give away the boiling under my skin. Ajax was further back, his mouth pressed into a hard line. Aaron stood in front of his mate, shielding her with his body, like even Blake’s gaze would burn her.
I didn’t blame him.
Blake couldn’t be trusted. Or underestimated. Not even in a room. full of people.
He stood in front of us, his wolves lingering behind him like shadows, their stances tense and vigilant. His face was bruised. His hands at his sides. No aggression. Just this strange, raw silence.
“I owe you guys an apology,” Blake started.
Chapter 188 – In My Shoes
Ajax scoffed. Loudly.
Blake didn’t blink.
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“I know words don’t mean much right now,” he continued, “but I’m not saying this for redemption. I’m saying it because it needs to be said.”
“Then say it and go,” I snapped.
Sheila didn’t speak. Just stared at him with those. eyes that made people flinch. Not Blake, though. He held her gaze like he deserved the full weight of it.
“I hurt you,” he said. “Both of you. I marked Lia without her consent. I lost control. I let instinct and desperation make decisions for me. And it nearly cost all of you your lives.”
“You think?” Ajax muttered.
Blake took a shaky breath. “There isn’t à day I don’t regret it. You don’t know what it’s like. Feeling that bond snap into place, only to realize she didn’t want it. That she couldn’t want it. And instead of letting go, I tried to force something that never belonged to me.”
I clenched my jaw.
He looked at Sheila. “I am sorry. For hurting you. For shooting
Chapter 188 In My Shoes.
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you. For joining hands with The Order in my desperation to be with my mate. Put yourself in my shoes and think for a second. If Aaron chose someone else right before your eyes, how would you have reacted?”
Still, Sheila didn’t say a word, just rolled her eyes like he was full of shit.
“You cannot even fathom it, can you?” Blake smiled, although his eyes didn’t match it. “No one can. I hadn’t even prepared for this. My mate wasn’t supposed to want someone else. Her being human—that was fine. I would have won her over. If she’d even had a human boyfriend, I would have won her heart the right way. But she was with another werewolf. Someone who could treat her exactly like I could, and more. I am not excusing my actions. I know I could have made different choices. But all I want is the tiniest bit of understanding. From one mated
werewolf to another.”
When Sheila glanced at him again, her eyes seemed gentler.
Blake turned to me then. “You were right to fight me. To hate me. I was lost. I don’t expect you to trust me now. I don’t even expect forgiveness. I just want you to know that I see it. I see the weight of what I did. And if it makes you feel better, I carry it every damn day.”
I didn’t answer.
Because part of me wanted to.
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Chapter 188 – In My Shoes.
That part I hated.
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Because the bastard looked sincere. Not in the way liars pretend.
But in that ugly, gutted way that made it hard to keep your anger clean.
I still had the scar from the bullet on my chest. And I would carry that defeat forever.
“After the war,” I said finally, “you’re gone.”
He nodded. No hesitation. “That was always the deal.”
“And what happens if we see Caitlyn before you do?”
His jaw tensed.
“I’m not asking as your friend,” I added. “I’m asking as someone who doesn’t trust you one bit.”
“If you see her…” he exhaled. “Growl. Warn her off. Don’t engage unless you have to. I’ll handle it.”
“You expect us to let a soldier of the Order walk?” Aaron asked.
“I expect you to let me deal with her,” he said quietly. “That’s all I’m asking. I made a vow. I intend to keep it.”
“And if she tries to kill someone before you get there?”
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Chapter 188 – In My Shoes
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“Then you do what you have to do,” he said. “But give me a chance first.”
I looked at him for a long time.
Still didn’t trust him.
But something in his eyes… it wasn’t just desperation. It was something deeper. Something that said he didn’t think he deserved this chance, but he’d fight for it anyway.
I hated that I recognized it.
Because in the strangest way, it reminded me of how Sapphire. looked at me that day.
In her creepy bedroom prison.
My hand went to my chest, fingers grazing the faint warmth that still lived there. That glow she’d left when she touched me hadn’t faded. Not completely. Some nights, I swore it pulsed under my skin. Like she was still out there somewhere, thinking of me.
But she hadn’t come back.
No notes anymore. No enchantments.
Not a word. Not even a whisper.
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Chapter 188 In My Shoes
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And that unsettled me more than all of this.
“Warner?” Blake said.
I blinked, snapping back to now.
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“I meant what I said,” Blake repeated. “And I’ll keep my distance. From everyone. Just point me at the enemy, and let me earn my way out.”
I didn’t answer.
He finally dared to look at Aaron again. “What I did was to have my mate close. It was wrong, but it stemmed from the fear of losing her. Not to pain or death, but to a life with someone else. I think, you might understand, if even in the slightest. I only wish to repent.”
Sheila sighed.
“You’ve got a lot to make up for, Blake,” she said, voice like ice. “Start with sticking to your promises in this war. Then we’ll see.”
Blake bowed his head slightly.
And walked away.
I stood there for a while, eyes fixed on the door he left through.
I didn’t forgive him.
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But something told me this fight wasn’t just going to be about blades and bullets.
Some fights were quieter.
Harder,
More strategic.
They were about choosing not to kill someone you still wanted to. About control. Holding back.
And maybe a little bit of mercy.
I didn’t do too well with that.
A warrior was supposed to be ruthless.
But I’d try anyway, hoping the girl didn’t cross my path.
If she hurt someone, though, anyone from the pack I was obligated to protect, I would rip her throat out without blinking.
