Chapter 141
The entire family sat with their eyes glued to the breakfast table and not looking at Tor would set off the rest of the table.
all. Each time one of them lifted their eyes they giggled which
He cleared his throat again, “can someone at least look up? I know you’re all angry, but I want to apologize, and I’d like to look at you when I do
“It’s your apology, Torq, Alcee rasped out, “but we don’t need to bend to
She was struggling not to lose her mind with laughter. How he managed to get up, use the bathroom, wash his hands, and come to the kitchen without looking in the mirror was beyond all of them but not one person was able to look him in the eye.
Antero had given him two very black eyes, like a raccoon, antennas drawn on his forehead and hundreds of little black freckles. How the man slept through Antero’s creative process was a mystery, but he’d snored right through it all. Now he was sitting at the head of the table with a serious expression on his face and everyone was trying with great difficulty to keep it together.
ugloved
It was hard though because each time he furrowed his brow, the antenna’s moved
Tito and Bastiano were both at the table and their shoulders shook hard.
on
forehead in a strange dance which set Antero off in giggles.
“What is wrong with you two?”
“Sorry boss,” Bastiano croaked out. “It’s um, it’s such a rare occasion for you to be offering apologies. We’re giddy with it.”
“Whatever. You were supposed to go home, and sort shit out. I don’t even know why you’re here.”
“I’m not ready.” Bastiano gave a shrug as he reached for some bacon off the table and put it on his plate. He held up the tongs to Antero in an offering and the boy nodded. “And it’s my job to have your back. I’m here to support you.”
“Fine.” Torq took a deep breath. “First, Antero,” he looked at the boy who giggled back while shoving a chunk of bacon in his mouth. “I owe you the biggest apology out of everyone at this table. I didn’t do my job very well as your dad. I didn’t listen to mom when she said going to the restaurant might not be best for you. I’m deeply sorry I made you uncomfortable. I’m sorry I made you feel scared and afraid. I’m sorry I didn’t hear you in the car when you said you didn’t like me. You were telling me you were scared. You were telling me you wanted to go home, and I didn’t listen. I am sorry. I was selfish and I was mean, and I won’t ever do it again. From now on, when you tell me things, I’m going to do better to listen. If I don’t, you can do to me what you did to Raniero.”
“I don’t like him.”
“I understand. We’ll get to this in a minute, but I want you to know you are not in trouble. You defended your mama the way I should, and I am enormously proud of you for being so brave to take on a grown up as you did.”
Alcee shifted in her seat torn between the heartfelt apology and the way his blackened eyes were making her want to laugh.
“Alcee,” he turned his attention to her.
She bit her lips together as she tried to look at him without laugh
“I owe you too many apologies to count for last night. I was not the man you deserve. I was thinking of myself more than anyone else, I hate crowds, probably as much as Antero and I was being singularly focused on my end goal to get through the evening. In doing so, despite all the diverse ways you spelled it out for me in black and white, I pushed it all out of my head and focused on achieving what I wanted. I had a vision of us presenting as this strong unified and collected family when the reality is, we are not.”
Her smile fell away at his words.
“The last thing I ever want to do with you is pretend, Alcee. I never want to pretend. Family is messy on a good day. I lay awake most of the night watching you and Antero sleeping beside me and I swear I only got about an hour or so of sleep once I finally crashed out. The whole time I lay there, I kept thinking of how blessed I am to have you, and I ruined it. I hurt you both and I am sorry. We, you, and I, are still trying to find our footing. Forcing you into a situation where you needed to pretend to be a loving example of the perfect wife was bullshit. We aren’t perfect. We are raw. We are new. We are a hundred ways to hell fucked up.” He stared at her seriously, “but we are also forever. I admire your strength and your courage and your heart and the way you would go to war for our son is a lesson for me. I learned from you last night, Alcee. I learned I have a long way to go before I can call myself a good husband or a good father but, if I am anything, I’m a quick study. The mistakes of last night are not ones I will make again. You and Antero, no matter what, will come, first. Dinners like last night may need to happen in the future but they will be with your input and if you both cannot be there, then you don’t come, and
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Chapter 141
will not push it. I will heed your advice on everything you tell us about our son. I will protect him the way you do, Alcee, and it is what I should have done last night, and I failed. For this, I am deeply sorry.”
She nodded and realized she was no longer laughing at the paint on his face but feeling his emotions in her. “Okay.”
Chapter Comments
Visitor
funny AF, but also very poignant
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